I have the most stubborn two year old. I know what you're thinking -- "Oh, everyone says that!" or "You haven't seen mine", etc. etc. No, really. I have the most stubborn two year old. Now she drives me crazy, but... and this is a big but... (notice the single "t") she also amazes me! I have never seen such single-minded determination in my life. Unfortunately, this can be determination towards disaster (like the time she insisted on pushing her head through the banister bars, but that is a story for another day).
She is unafraid of absolutely everything and more importantly, everyone. While this is an impediment to me as her mother, I suspect that it will be the source of her future success. From a very young age, I have been aware of others and their approval (or lack thereof). I have shaped decisions small and large to fit into my idea of what others wanted. Notice I said my idea of what others wanted because who truly knows what another desires. She demonstrates none of that She will argue anything! This includes whether or not she is arguing. One afternoon during an especially protracted no-nap fueled meltdown, I told her that she argues too much. She screamed back -- "I no argue. You argue. I happy! "
I am not suggesting that these are terrific social skills for a 38 year old. There is something there, however. Something dynamic and powerful and strong. I wish I had even a smidge of that power and independent spirit. I think that it would do me some good.